One Month
January 30, 2020
One of my big goals for this year is to cherish the moments with all my kids—but especially Sean. This will likely be our last child so I want to remember as much as possible. Each month I am planning to write down our favorite memories, milestones, and how I felt the month went, in an effort to preserve the sweet moments in my mind.
Baby milestones: Sean is holding his head up a little bit! He also started smiling occasionally. Sometimes I will pick him up and he will look at me, smile, happy to see me. He still sleeps a lot. We don’t really have a routine yet, but he does know the difference between day and night and sleeps pretty well at night—mostly.
Happiest memory: Honestly, one of the best memories from the past month was when we were still in the hospital. The first night, I was up with Sean at 1 in the morning, trying to get him to nurse. He was so sleepy and didn’t want to, but it had been a while, so I was trying. Outside the window I could see dozens of Christmas lights, illuminating the parking lot, and snow was falling slowly from the sky. It was beautiful. There have been so many days since then where I have been nursing and watching the snow fall from the sky.
Describe the month in one word: Cozy. While one of my goals was to get out of the house at least once every day, and I accomplished that—mostly—much of the month was spent in my red and white snowflake PJs with hot cocoa or coffee in hand. While the kids went to school for part of the day, the rest of our days were cuddled up on the couch, reading books, watching sign language videos, and sipping soup.
How I am feeling: Happy. Joyous. Grateful. Honestly, this comes as a bit of a surprise to me, as I was worried about my mood (depression, anxiety, etc.) this postpartum, especially considering it was taking place in the dead of winter, but I was aware of this concern and put the tools in place before Sean was born and it paid off big time. Perhaps more on that at a different time.
Overall, I can’t believe my baby is a month. The time is going by way too fast. I want the snuggles, and the nursing, and the little baby stretches and faces he makes to last forever. But I know they won’t. So I am enjoying them for now.